Monthly Archives: December 2008

See what British journalists are really like

WE’VE ONLY MISSED a few Bill Moores’ parties at Ye Olde Cheshire Cheese in Fleet Street, and unfortunately we missed yesterday’s event, as we’re in Sunny Bengaluru, rather than the cold Chrismassy atmosphere in London Town.

So thanks to fiends for sending us links to the best and worst of British journalism, raw in tooth and flesh, with the entire set here. It is Daryl Wilcox hosted now – he was a fine journalist – we used to call him Dayrate Wilcox –  but he has gone to the other side.  I wasn’t invited.

On Friday I wear my Scottish Quilt

FRIDAY IS ETHNIC DAY in the office where I work in Ole Bengaluru, and so I decided to see if Umli Miuli, the editorial assistant, on the www.itexaminer.com could sort out a kilt, a sporran and bagpipes for me.

I was joking, because there isn’t an ethnic day on Friday, but she reacted in her usual enthusiastic and efficient manner. She called one company which was delighted to make a tartan quilt for me, and were ready to send someone round to measure me up. She called another company which advised her that no, unfortunately, they didn’t. But they could recommend a shop in London that could. Not Edinburgh.

Now this is more like it, she got this email from one firm:

Hi Umli,
We can deliver to India from here.Please say which tartan or if you wish us to choose
If you like we can phone you now to discuss. Please email your phone number
 Thanks
John
This, we believe, is a Scottish supplier.  You, my dear one reader, probably want to know what my tartan is. My mum was a Robertson.  This is the clan tartan.  And yes, I have worn a kilt. And no I don’t have a set of bagpipes. And yes, I had a sporran.  And no, I don’t have any pictures.

Louis Vuitton cans Tokyo shop plan

IT IS WITH THE deepest regret that we notice that Louis Vuitton has decided against opening yet another shop in Tokyo.

According to nikkei.net, it’s because people aren’t buying as much as they used to. More worryingly, it appears that 57 out of the 400 shops it owns worldwide are in Japan.

Louis Vuitton is rightly famous for having a sculture of a bag on display outside the bright, spanking new Bangalore International Airport.  Sadly, this wonderful sculpture, a full 25 feet high, has now disappeared. ♥

Welcome to Bangalore, India’s capital of coat hangers

YOU MIGHT THINK (mistakenly) that Bangalore is the world capital of pubs. Oh no, it is the world capital of coat hangers.

I know this because someone has just moved into the apartment here in Bengaluru and she was suffering a drastic shortage of coat hangers. So she’s been out today, and came back so happy at finding coat hangers that she went out and bought another clutch.

At Rs98 for eight, this seems sort of a reasonable price. She bought pink ones and blue ones and nicked most of mine too. Unfortunately, I haven’t yet unpacked and so I will have to either demand some back, or go down and buy some pink ones for myself.  Foolishly, I forgot to pack any trousers before I left Blighty, so I’ve had to go buy a couple of pair today. And they’ll need coat hangers, won’t they?

Cadburys invades pub

HOW THINGS have changed.  Just a few years back you’d get posses of young women invading pubs in Blighty offering customers free packets of fags and lighters.

Round the corner from my apartment in the Defence Colony in Bangalore, there’s a bar called Take Five, a dark place where you need to light a candle to read the menu. So last night we were astonished by two young women who came round offering people bars of Cadburys chocolate. Chocolate and beer? Well, they certainly don’t traditionally go together that well. ♦

Banga-Banga-Bangalore beckons

I WILL SOON be able to experience the delights of the 100 Feet Road because I’m writing this from Terminal 5 Heathrow on my way to Bangalore.

Just out there for a couple of weeks this time round but I’m used to getting away from the freezing cold weather here in Old Blighty, and to the sunshine, flowers and butterflies of Bangalore. See you on the other side!